Deadliest Warrior: Cartoon Xover Edition
by ANIMAL KING 415
Summary: I've decided to start again. These fights are based on oppion. Please R&R, but no flames.
1. Wile E Coyote vs Pete

**I don't own the show "The Deadliest Warrior" or any of the characters fighting in it.**

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Narrator: Wile E. Coyote; The genious coyote of the Looney Tunes, bent on catching the roadrunner.

(The screen shows a brown furred coyote using various weapons to get his meal.)

Narrator: Pete; Disney's first villain and arch-enemy of Mickey Mouse.

(The screen then shows a fat humanoid cat commanding an army of Heartless.)

Narrator: WHO...IS...DEADLIEST? To find out, our world-class fighters are testing each of the two combatants most leathal weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two go toe-to-toe. No rules, no safety, no mercey: It's a duel to the death, all to see just who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!

We enter the fight club once again.

Narrator: Here at the fight club, the host has brought experts on the two warriors to see who would win between...Wile E. Coyote

Wile E. Coyote's Stats:

Fist appearance: "Fast and Furry-ous" (1949)

Enemies: Bugs Bunny and the Roadrunner

Voice actor: None

Created by: Chuck Jones

Narrator: And Pete.

Pete's Stats:

First apperance: "Steamboat Willie" (1928)

Enemies: Mickey Mouse, Goofy, Donald Duck, and Sora

Voice actor: Jim Cummings

Created by: Walt Disney

Narrator: Both teams are confident of their vicories.

Team Wile E. Coyote is represented by arch-rival, Bugs Bunny, and by desendent, Tech E. Coyote.

"That coyote may not be able to catch me, but when facing that maroon, He'll come out on tops." Bugs said while munching on a carrot.

"My ancestor might not have been able to catch Rev's ancestor, but I got my genious from somewhere." Tech gloated, thinking he knows the outcome.

Team Pete will be represented by his rivals, Mickey Mouse and Goofy.

"That guy is smarter than Pete, I'll give him that. But there's no way he'll beat him in this fight!" Mickey said.

"Garsh, I think that the only ones who could beat him are Sora and Mickey himself, a-yuck!" Goofy replied.

Narrator: Both teams have brought the two's weapons...

Wile E. Coyote's weapons:

Long range- Hunting Rifle

Mid range- Boomarang

Close range- Axe

Special weapon- TNT

Pete's weapons:

Long range- Fireworks

Mid range- Flintlock Pistol

Close range- Musketeer Sword

Special weapon- Explosive Bowling Balls

Narrator: First up is long range, and Team Coyote bring...The Hunting Rifle.

In the firing range, Bugs takes the hunting rifle and aims at a target made to look like Pete. He fires away until all bullets are gone. Close examination reveils bullet wounds above the heart, in the stomach, and in the head.

Narrator: Team Pete is impressed, but bring to the fight...Fireworks.

Mickey steps out into the firing range and aims the fireworks at a heartless. He fires the fireworks and the heartless goes down, imobilelized.

Narrator: The fireworks had a longer range and a higher chance of hitting the target; but it's a stunning weapon. Due to it's leathality, the edge goes to the hunting rifle.

Edge: Wile E. Coyote

Narrator: For mid range weapons, Team Coyote brings...The Boomarang; once used as a hunting tool in Australia, now used as one in Navada.

Tech takes the boomarang and takes aim at a gel torso. He throws the boomarang and it slices through the arm, literally 'dis-arming' it.

Narrator: Team Pete isn't impressed by this, and fire back with...The Flintlock Pistol; a reminder of Pete's days as a boat captian.

Goofy takes aim at a dummy made to look like Wile E. and fires the flintlock pistol. The bullet wounds went deep through it.

Narrator: The boomarang disarmed the opponent, but it's a premitave weapon. The edge goes to the flintlock pistol.

Edge: Pete

Narrator: For close range, Team Coyote brings...The Axe; an old friend on Deadliest Warrior.

Bugs steps up to a carcass with the axe and swings at it. The axe cuts the carcass clean in half, in a mere 3.5 seconds.

Narrator: Team Pete answer back with...The Musketeer Sword; a sword familiar to the show.

Mickey steps up to another carcass and swings the musketeer sword. The sword delivered five kill strikes in 16 seconds.

Narrator: The musketeer sword was impressive, but it couldn't compare to the speed of the axe.

Edge: Wile E. Coyote

Narrator: Finally, it's time for special weapons. Team Coyote brings to the fight...TNT; one of Wile E.'s most used weapons.

Tech takes a stick of TNT and places it near a dummy made to look like Pete. He then lights the fuse and high tales it. The TNT went off, destorying the dummy in the process.

Narrator: As impressed as they are, Team Pete answers back with...Explosive Bowling Balls.

Goofy targets some dummies that were set up like bowling pins. Goofy aims the bowling balls and throws it. When they made impact, the dummies blew up.

Narrator: The TNT is relieable, but unpredictable. And a fuse takes time to set it off. The edge goes to the explosive bowling balls.

Edge: Pete

Narrator: Testing is now complete, it's time to see who is more superior. The data from the tests will be uploaded into a battle simulation, developed by Slitherine Studios. To keep this battle from being won by a single lucky blow, the simulation will be ran 1000 times. Who will win? Coyote Vs Cat...Villain Vs Villain...Brains Vs Brawns...

(The screen shows Wile E., then Pete. Next, the screen shows Wile E. hunting the roadrunner, then Pete fighting Sora. Finally, the screen shows Wile E. planing his next move, then Pete sending a foe flying.)

Narrator: WHO...IS...DEADLIEST?

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Simulation:

Out in the desert, roadrunner is zooming on the road. On the side of the road, looking through binoculars, Wile E. Coyote licks his lips but stops as the screen freezes with the words "Coyote ("Opponeticus Oneacus")". The screen resumes playing as Wile E. finishes. Suddenly, Wile E. hears a noise of something coming torwards him. He turns around and sees fireworks aiming for him. Wile E. dodges the fireworks just in time, as they hit the ground.

Wile E. looks up and sees the source of the fireworks: Pete! Pete looks down and yells, but the screen freezes again with the words reading "Pete ("Opponeticus Twoacus")". He finishes yelling as he jumps down and glares at the coyote. Wile E. pulls out a boomarang and throws it at the charging Pete, but the latter grabs it and crushes it with his bare hands. Pete pulls out his musketeer sword as Wile E. pulls out his axe. As the two fight with those weapons, Pete cuts Wile E.'s arm, while the coyote cuts off the former's peg-leg, causing him to fall to the ground.

Thinking quickly, Wile E. lights a stick of TNT, drops it near Pete, and runs for it. Pete, however, gets back up and puts the fuse out. Grabbing a nearby stick, he replaces his peg-leg, gets up, and pulls out an explosive bowling ball. Wile E. sees this and runs as Pete throws it and blows up a catus that the coyote was just in front of. Now knowing what he's up against, Wile E. runs for his den, shuts the door and locks it, just as Pete was charging for it.

Thinking even more quickly, Wile E. sets up a decoy him (Made of a broomstick and a coyote mask), grabs his hunting rifle, shuts off the lights and ducks behind his sofa. Pete breaks the door down and sees the silohette of "Wile E." He pulls out his flintlock pistol and fires at it. Smirking, Pete turns on the lights and sees that he shot a dummy. Pete looks at it until he hears a click, looks up and sees Wile E. aiming his hunting rifle at him. He fires and watches Pete fall. After making sure his opponet is dead, Wile E. smirks as he picks up Pete's flintlock pistol, thinking he could use this for his regular routine.

* * *

Winner: Wile E. Coyote

Narrator: In the 1000 battles, Wile E. was victorius with 585-kills, compared with Pete's 415-kills. There were two main facotors for this: First was the years of evil doing; Pete was more of a bully and just starting using these weapons for a few years. Wile E., however, has been using these weapons for years. Second, the intellagence; Wile E. Coyote is a super-geinus, whereas Pete, as said by Sora, "not smart enough to tie his own shoes."

Wile E. Coyote's kills: 585

Hunting Rifle- 326

Boomarang- 0

Axe- 212

TNT- 47

Pete's kills: 415

Fireworks- 248

Flintlock Pistol- 100

Musketeer Sword- 32

Explosive Bowling Balls- 35

At the fight club, the teams discuss what happened.

"I knew my ancestor would win! There was no doubt in my mind." Tech said, glad with the outcome.

"Garsh, there's a thrid person who could defeat Pete." Goofy said.

(The screen then shows Wile E. Coyote aiming his 'new' Flintlock Pistol at the roadrunner. He pulls the trigger, but it misfires. The roadrunner runs off, leaving the coyote to hold up a sign reading, "Even when I win, I lose.")

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(In related news...THERE'S GONNA BE A SEASON 3 OF DEADLIEST WARRIOR!)


	2. Jason Voorhees vs Leatherface

**I don't own the show "The Deadliest Warrior" or any of the characters fighting in it.**

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Narrator: Jason Voorhees; The mass murder who's motive or killing is driven by the actions of his victims.

(The screen shows a man wearing ragged clothes and a hockey mask, killing teenagers.)

Narrator: Leatherface; The cannibalistic muder of Texas.

(The screen then shows a man wearing ragged clothes and a mask made of human skin, wielding a chainsaw.)

Narrator: WHO...IS...DEADLIEST? To find out, our world-class fighters are testing both warrior's most leathal weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two go toe-to-toe. No rules, no safety, no mercey: It's a duel to the death, all to see just who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!

We enter the fight club once again.

Narrator: Here at the fight club, the host has brought experts on the two most deadly movie villains, all to see who would win between...Jason Voorhees

Jason's Stats:

First appearance: Friday the 13th (1980)

Home: Crystal Lake

Played by: Richard Brooker

Trademark: Hockey Mask

Narrator: And Leatherface.

Leatherface's Stats:

First appearance: Texas Chainsaw Massacure

Home: Texas

Played by: Gunner Hansen

Trademark: Leather Mask; Chainsaw

Narrator: Both teams are confident of their villains success.

Team Jason will be represented by brother and sister, Whitney and Clay Miller.

"When Jason kidnapped me, I learned how dangerous he realy is." Whitney said, still truamitized by what happened that night.

"That Leatherface guy won't know what hit him!" Clay said, agreeing with his sister.

Team Leatherface will be represented by Michelle and Benny. (AN: I couldn't find their last names.)

"Jason's scary, but he won't last ten seconds against Leatherface." Michelle said.

"We've seen what this guy can do, let me tell ya, not pretty!" Benny said.

Narrator: Both teams brought the two villain's most deadly weapons.

Jason's weapons:

Long range- Harpoon

Mid range- Throwing Knife

Close range- Axe

Special weapons- Machette

Leatherface's weapons:

Long range- Throwing Meathook

Mid range- Butcher Knife

Close range- Sledgehammer

Special weapon- Chainsaw

Narrator: First is long range. Team Jason bring to the fight...The Harpoon; death at a distance.

Whitney aims a harpoon at a dummy made to look like Leatherface. She throws the harpoon which impales the dummy right through the heart and out the back.

Narrator: Team Leatherface are impressed, but answer back with...The Throwing Meathook.

Michelle aims at a carcass and throws the meathook. The meathook stabs into the flesh, causing internal damage.

Narrator: The meathook could cause a lot of damage, but the harpoon is more aerodynamic, making it more lethal from a distance.

Edge: Jason

Narrator: In mid range testing, both teams bring knives to the fight...Jason's Throwing Knife and Leatherface's Butcher Knife.

Clay aims at a gel torso with the throwing knife. The first attempt, he misses. On his second try, he manages to hit it into the throat. Benny takes aim at another gel torso with the butcher knife. He throws the knife and impales it right in between the eyes.

Narrator: The throwing knife has verious options, but it's accurecy is not all great. The butcher knife can cause a great amount of trauma if it hits the target, giving it the edge.

Edge: Leatherface

Narrator: For close range, Team Jason brings...The Axe; Once used for chopping wood, now used for chopping flesh.

Whitney steps up to a carcass with the axe and swings. When she does, the axe slices the carcass clean in two.

Narrator: Team Leatherface are not impressed as the answer back with...The Sledgehammer; A weapon of mass destruction.

Michelle steps up to a skull with the sledgehammer in hand. She swings the hammer and crushes the skull in a single blow.

Narrator: The sledgehammer is almost like a portable wrecking-ball, but the axe can cause far more damage in a less amout of time.

Edge: Jason

Narrator: Finally, it's time for special weapons as both teams bring the two's most favorite weapons...The Machette and the Chainsaw.

Clay comes up to a gel torso and begins hacking away at it. He strikes the throat, the head, and the chest. He swings it again, and neary beheaded the gel torso. Benny steps up to a carcass and powers up the chainsaw. As he approaches the carcass, the chainsaw cuts through the carcass' fleash and bone.

Narrator: The machette is perfect for hacking a vicitm to death, but the chainsaw caused even more massive truama.

Edge: Leatherface

Narrator: Testing is now complete, it's time to see who is more superior. The data from the tests will be uploaded into a battle simulation, developed by Slitherine Studios. To keep this showdown from being won by a single lucky blow, the simulation will be ran 1000 times. Who will win? Silent Killer Vs Murdering Cannibal...Killer For Mother Vs Killer For Family...Near Immortal Vs Human...

(The screen shows Jason sneaking up on an unsuspecting victim, then Leatherface eating his. Next, the screen shows Jason hearing his mother's voice telling him to kill for her, then Leatherface bringing the dead victim home. Finally, the screen shows Jason using superhuman strength, then Leatherface doing his killing with his chainsaw.)

Narrator: WHO...IS...DEADLIEST?

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Simulation:

At Crystal Lake, the sound of partying teenagers gets the attention of Jason as he emerges from his watery home. He heads to dry land and prepares for the kill. Nearby, Leatherface also hears the noise as he comes forward. However, his mission is stopped short as he and Jason spot one another. Leatherface takes out his throwing meathook at throws it at Jason, who got out of the way in time. Jason pulls out his throwing knife and throws it at his opponent. The knife misses as Leatherface throws his butcher knife.

That knife hits Jason in the leg, just above his knee. Jason pulls it out, and stares at Leatherface. Seeing what he's up against, Jason retreat to a nearby boathouse, with Leatherface in presuit. When he gets to the boathouse, Leatherface opens the door and pulls out another butcher knife, looking around for his opponent. Jason, up in the rafters, was aiming his harpoon at Leatherface. He throws it, and it impales Leatherface's foot, making him scream in pain.

Leatherface pulls the harpoon out and looks up to see Jason jumping from the rafters with his axe. Leatherface pulls out his sledgehammer at the same time. Leatherface swings his sledgehammer and breaks Jason's leg, the latter having sliced the former's arm. As Leatherface looks at his arm, Jason retreats to the back of the boathouse. Having had enough of this, Leatherface drops his sledgehammer and picks up a nearby chainsaw, starting it up as he follows his enemy.

Jason, hearing the chainsaw and Leatherface's footsteps, pulls out his machette and waits behind a crate. Leatherface enters the back and looks for Jason. Then, Jason jumps from behind the crate, puts a chokehold on Leatherface, and slices the latter's throat. Watching his enemy fall, and the chainsaw still moving, Jason goes back to what he entended on doing before the battle.

* * *

Winner: Jason Voorhees

Narrator: In the 1000 battles, Jason won with 545-kills, whereas Leatherface was able to obtain 455-kills.

Jason's kills: 545

Harpoon- 215

Throwing Knife- 71

Axe- 200

Machette- 59

Leatherface's kills: 455

Throwing Meathook- 9

Butcher Knife- 96

Sledgehammer- 150

Chainsaw- 200

At the fight club, the teams discuss what happened.

"I knew that Jason would win this fight, being that he can never die." Whiteny said.

"I just pray that Jason dosen't come around near Texas." Benny said with a worried look.

(The screen then shows Jason heading torwards the teenagers with his machette in hand.)


	3. GUN vs Cobra

**I don't own the show "Deadliest Warrior" or any of the characters fighting in it.**

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Narrator: _The Guardian Units of Nations; The elite special forces of Station Square._

(The screen shows a group of people in SWAT-like clothing taking out crooks.)

Narrator: _Cobra; The vicious terrorists, and nemisous of the G.I. Joe team._

(The screen then shows a group of people in blue and black army clothing attacking American soilders.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST? To find out, our world-class fighters are testing each of the team's most deadly weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two goe toe-to-toe. No rules, no safety, no mercey: It's a duel to the death, all to see just who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!_

We once again enter the fight club.

Narrator: _Here at the fight club, the host has brought two members of each side to see who would win in a fight between...The Guardian Units of Nations..._

G.U.N.'s Stats:

First appearance: Sonic Adventure 2 (2001)

Enemies: Dr. Eggman, The Black Arms, & Shadow at one point

Goal: To protect the world

Created by: The Sonic Team

Narrator_:...And Cobra._

Cobra's Stats:

First appearance: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero (1989)

Enemies: G.I. Joe Team

Goal: World domination

Created by: Larry Hama

Narrator: _Both teams are confident about their victories._

Team G.U.N. is represented by the GUN Commander and Agent Topaz.

"G.U.N. has faced space monsters, giant robots, and just about anything you can throw at us. Cobra won't stand much of a chance." the Commander gloated.

"They might be well organized, but I'm sure we can take them." Topaz added.

Team Cobra will be represented by Cobra Commander and The Baroness.

"Those G.I.'s have trouble with defeating us...Which they never will. What makes G.U.N. think they'll win?" Cobra Commander, litterally, hissed.

"G.U.N. make think their tough, but Cobra will crush them!" Baroness said with an unrecognizable European accent.

Narrator: _Both teams have brought the two squad's weapons..._

G.U.N.'s weapons:

Long range- Bazooka

Mid range- Laser Rifle

Close range- Combat Knife

Special weapon- G.U.N. Shield

Explosive weapon- C4

Cobra's weapons:

Long range- M-16

Mid range- Skorpion VZ. 61

Close range- Tokarev TT-33

Special weapon- Flamethrower

Explosive weapon- SEMTEX

Narrator: _First up is long range. Team GUN brings to the fight...The Bazooka; a weapon that shoots explosive rockets long distances._

The GUN Commander steps out into the firing range and aims the bazooka at a group of dummies made to look like Cobra soldiers. He pulls the trigger and a rocket zooms out torwards the targets. When the rocket made impact, an explosion was created...destroying all but one target. Said target is only partly destroyed...missing it's legs and arms.

Narrator: _Team Cobra is impressed, but fire back with...The M16 Rifle._

Cobra Commander steps out into the firing range with the M16 and takes aim at five targets made to look like GUN Troops. He fires a shower of bullets into all the targets. Close examination reviels bullet wounds in the temple, above the heart, and in the stomach.

Narrator: _The M16 was a fast weapon, but has a shorter range then the bazooka, giving it the edge._

Edge: GUN

Narrator: _Next is mid range weapons. Team GUN brings...The Laser Rifle._

Topaz steps out into the firing range with the laser rifle and takes aim at a dummy in a Cobra soilder's uniform. She pulls the trigger and a green laser fires out of the gun. The laser made a large gapping hole in the chest when it made impact.

Narrator: _Team Cobra is once again impressed, but not impressed enough as they answer back with...The Skorpion VZ. 61._

Baroness steps out to the firing range and aims the skorpion at five dummies in GUN uniforms. She takes fire and shoots a shower of bullets from the submachine pistol. When she's finnished, their are bullet wounds in every one of the dummies' chests.

Narrator: _The Skorpion was faster than the laser rifle, but the wounds were small compared to the rifle's. Laser rifle gets the edge._

Edge: GUN

Narrator: _Now it's time for close range weapons. Team GUN comes forward with...The Combat Knife._

The GUN Commander steps up to a gel torso with the knife in hand. He then takes the knife and stabs and slashes at the torso, causing massive flesh wounds.

Narrator: _Team Cobra isn't phased one bit as the fire back with...The Tokarev TT-33 Pistol._

Cobra Commander steps out to the firing range and fires the pistol staight at a dummy made to look like a GUN soilder. The bullet goes striaght through the heart.

Narrator: _Due to it's longer range and higher leathlity, the edge goes to the Tokarev Pistol._

Edge: Cobra

Narrator: _For special weapons, Team GUN brings...The GUN Shield; a bullet proof riot shield._

Topaz puts a shield into the hands of a target made to look like a GUN soilder. She then grabs one of Cobra's weapons- the Skorpion VZ. 61- and fires at the target. Not one bullet damaged the shield.

Narrator: _Team Cobra is still not impressed. They plan to heat things up with...The Flamethrower._

Baroness takes aim with the flamethrower and fires at the same target holding the shield. Both the target and the shield burst into flames, and where reduced to ash in mere minutes.

Narrator: _The shield was perfect for protection from bullets; fire is another story. The edge goes to the flamethrower._

Edge: Cobra

Narrator: _Finally, it's time for explosive weapons. Team GUN brings...C4 Explosives._

The GUN Commander places a slab of C4 under a table in the firing range as part of a scenario, complete with three targets. He then steps a mile away and activates the detonator. The C4 explodes and the table and two of the targets are destroyed.

Narrator: _Team Cobra is not impressed that much and answers back with...SEMTEX; an explosive twice as powerful as TNT._

Cobra Commander does the exact same scenario, with three more tagets. He steps a mile away then activates the detonator. The SEMTEX explodes and destroies all the targets.

Narrator: _Due to the bigger blast, SEMTEX gets the edge._

Edge: Cobra

Narrator: _Testing is now complete, it's time to see who is more superior. The data from the tests will be uploaded into a battle simulation, developed by Slitherine Studios. To keep this battle from being won by a single lucky shot, the simulation will be ran 1000 times. Who will win? Good Vs Evil...Guardians Vs Terrorists...Team Vs Team..._

(The screen shows GUN soilders, then Cobra troops. Next, the screen shows a GUN agent rescueing a hostage, then a Cobra soilder holding someone hostage. Finally, the screen shows a group of GUN agents, then a group of Cobra soilders.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST?_

* * *

Simulation:

Having gotten orders to eliminate a new threat to Station Square, six G.U.N. soilders (5 men and 1 woman) enter a large abandonded factory, thinking it maybe their hideout. The leader gives a signal to the others to split up and search the grounds.

Meanwhile, six Cobra soilders (5 men and 1 woman) pull up near the factory in a jeep. It really was their hideout. The leader gets a feeling their not alone and order the rest of the group to spilt up and search the factory.

G.U.N.- 6

Cobra- 6

As both teams enter the factory, one of the G.U.N. agents spots one of the Cobra soilders. Carefully pulling out his laser rifle, he takes aim and fires. The laser hit the soilder dead in the chest.

G.U.N.- 6

Cobra- 5

Both teams hear the noise and investegate the source. Another Cobra soilder spots the GUN soilder with the rifle and aims his Skorpion VZ. 61 at him and fires.

G.U.N.- 5

Cobra- 5

Outside, the GUN leader and a rookie soilder find the jeep that the enemies have arrived in. Taking out a slab of C4, he ties it to the bottom of the jeep. The leader then looks at the rookie and orders her to press the detonator as soon as the enemy is insight and near the jeep. She agrees and the leader enters the factory again with a bazooka.

Inside the factory, two GUN soilders are being chased by the female Cobra member as she fires her M16. Both GUN members lift up their G.U.N. Shields and block the bullets. One of them pulls out his laser rifle and fires at the Cobra member, who dodges it. The GUN leader then appears and orders the two to get down. They do so and the leader fires his bazooka at the Cobra member, blowing her up.

G.U.N.- 5

Cobra- 4

Another GUN member is running from a Cobra member, who's shooting his M16 at him. The bullets bounce off his shield, and the GUN member jumps behind a crate and pulls out his combat knife. The Cobra member searches for him and the GUN member jumps him and stabs him in the back. While this was happening, another Cobra member was aiming his flamethrower at the GUN member and fired, burning both the GUN soilder and the dead Cobra soilder.

G.U.N.- 4

Cobra- 3

The GUN leader and the two other members are searching for an exit and find one. What they don't know, however, is that a Cobra member placed a slab of SEMTEX on it. As the GUN leader opens the door, the Cobra soilder presses the detonator, sending the GUN leader flying backwards onto the floor. One of the GUN soilders fires his laser rifle at the Cobra soilder, killing him.

G.U.N.- 4

Cobra- 2

The two check on the injured leader, but don't feel a pulse. They mourn him breifly and continue their mission.

G.U.N.- 3

Cobra- 2

The Cobra member with the flamethrower spots the two and shoots flames at them. One of them dodged out of the way in time, but his friend was not so lucky.

G.U.N.- 2

Cobra- 2

The GUN soilder then took his laser rifle and fired at the tank of the flamethrower. The Cobra member screamed, then bursted into flames.

G.U.N.- 2

Cobra- 1

Exhusted, the GUN member tries to find the exit. As he reaches the door knob, he feels something on the back of his head...It was the Cobra leader holding a Tokarev TT-33 pistol. He pulls the trigger at point-blank range, and watches the GUN member fall.

G.U.N.- 1

Cobra- 1

Smirking in victory, the Cobra leader goes out to his jeep and opens the door. Nearby, in a shead just outside the factory, the rookie has just spotted the Cobra leader enter the car. She pulls out the detonator and presses the button.

**BOOOOOOOOMMMMM!**

The jeep explodes in a ball of fire.

G.U.N.- 1

Cobra- 0

The rookie GUN member exits the shead and shouts "GUN!" in victory.

* * *

Winner: G.U.N.

Narrator: _In the 1000 battles, GUN was victorius with 567-kills, compared to Cobra's 433-kills._

G.U.N.'s kills: 567

Bazooka- 384

Laser Rifle- 120

Combat Knife- 13

G.U.N. Shield- 0

C4- 50

Cobra's kills: 433

M16- 204

Skorpion VZ. 61- 100

Tokarev TT-33 Pistol- 50

Flamethrower- 22

SEMTEX- 57

At the fight club, the teams discuss what happened.

"There was no doubt in my mind that we'd win." Topaz gloated.

"What does that computer know? COBRA WOULD CRUSH THEM IN REAL LIFE!" Baroness exclaimed in anger.

(The screen then shows the GUN agent yelling "GUN!" in victory.)


	4. Kratos vs Sephiroth

**I don't own the show "Deadliest Warrior" or any of the characters fighting in it.**

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(AN: I would like to appologize in advance if I don't get the weapon action for Kratos' weapon's; I have never played "God of War" before.)

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Narrator: _Kratos; Vicious Spartan warrior, and the slayer of the greek gods._

(The screen shows a man with pale-gray skined man with green eyes and a red tatto slaying a basilisk.)

Narrator: _Sephiroth; The strongest prototype SOLDIER alive._

(The screen then shows a man dressed in black with long white hair, wielding a long sword.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST? To find out, our world-class fighters are testing both warriors most leathal weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two go toe-to-toe. No rules, no safety, no mercey: It's a duel to the death, all to find out just who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!_

We once again enter the fight club.

Narrator: _Here at the fight club, the host has brought experts on both the warriors to see who would win between...Kratos..._

Kratos' Stats:

First appearance: God of War: Chains of Olympus (2008)

Voice actor: Terrence C. Carson

Enemy: Ares

Loyalty: The other Gods of Olympus

Narrator: _And Sephiroth..._

Sephiroth's Stats:

First appearance: Final Fantasy VII (1997)

Voice actor: George Newbern

Enemy: Cloud Strife

Loyalty: Himself

Narrator: _Both teams are confident about their warrior's victories._

Team Kratos is made up of his brother, Deimos, and his half-brother, Apollo.

"My brother can tackle any beast he comes across," Deimos said, "What chance does a mortal have?"

"Not even the mightiest of beasts can take him down." Apollo agreed.

Team Sephiroth is represented by Cloud Strife and Sora.

"We've seen what Sephiroth is capable of," Cloud said, "Kratos won't stand a chance."

"He's bringing weapons to this fight that Kratos could only dream of." Sora added.

Narrator: _Both teams have brought the two warrior's most deadly weapons..._

Kratos' weapons:

Long range- Apollo's Bow

Mid range- Nemean Cestus

Close range- Blade of Olympus

Special weapon- Golden Fleece

Sephiroth's weapons:

Long range- Hand Cannon

Mid range- Masamune

Close range- War Hammer

Special weapon- Black Materia

Narrator: _First up is long range. Team Kratos brings...Appollo's Bow._

Appollo (it is his bow after all) takes the bow out to the firing range and aims at a target made to look like Sephiroth. He pulls back and sends the arrow flying, hitting the target stright in the chest. Another arrow is fired and it hits the target right in the left eye.

Narrator: _Team Sephiroth is unimpressed as they fire back with...The Hand Cannon._

Cloud steps out into the firing range with the hand cannon. He takes aim at a target made to look like Kratos. He lights the fuse and fires, making a killing bullet wound in between the eyes.

"But that's not all this baby can do." Cloud gloated.

To prove his point, Cloud used the hand cannon like a club on another target made to look like Kratos. After a few swings, the target's skull craks.

Narrator: _Both the hand cannon and Appollo's bow were great at long range; but both had their share of disadvantages. The hand cannon has two functions: a gun and a club, but was slower to reload. The bow was faster to reload, but it was primative. These advantages and disadvantages give them both the edge._

Edge: Draw

Narrator: _Next is mid range weapons. Team Kratos brings...The Nemean Cestus._

Deimos brings out the Nemean Cestus and puts them on. One of the lion heads extends out and grabs a nearby gel torso, bringing it closer to Deimos. Deimos then uses the other to slam the torso's neck, breaking it.

Narrator: _Team Sephiroth is impressed but answer back with...The Masamune._

Sora steps up to a carcass with the Masamune and swings. The sword slices through the carcass on the first swing, going through flesh and bone.

Narrator: _The Nemean Cestus was a nasty weapon with both wounds caused from both heads. However, it has a shorter range then the Masamune, which gives the latter the edge._

Edge: Sephiroth

Narrator: _Now, it's time for close range weapons. Team Kratos brings to the fight...The Blade of Olympus._

Appollo steps up to a carcass with the Blade of Olympus and swings. Just like the Masamune, the Blade slices the carcass in half on the first swing.

Narrator: _Team Sephiroth is impressed, but they fight back with...The War Hammer._

Sora takes the war hammer and walks up to a model of a human skull. He slams the hammer on said skull, the impact shattering it into a million, tiny pieces.

Narrator: _The war hammer may have destroyed a skull, but it needs to be close enough to get a kill. With it's longer range, the edge goes to The Blade of Olympus._

Edge: Kratos

Narrator: _Finally, it's time for special weapons. Team Kratos brings...The Golden Fleece._

For this deminstration, Deimos places the golden fleece on his arm as he does the demenstration with Sora. Sora uses the fire spell and sends a jet of fire at Deimos. The latter just uses the fleece to reflect the spell, sending it back at Sora, who dodged it just in time.

Narrator: _Team Sephiroth isn't impressed as they counter with...The Black Materia._

Cloud steps out into the firing range with the Black Materia in his hand. He stands a few feet away from a target made to look like Kratos and shouts, "Meteor!" (AN: I don't know what the actual summunance is.) Suddenly, a large meteor falls from the sky and crushes the target flat.

Narrator: _The fleece was good defense, but not good offense. The edge goes to The Black Materia._

Edge: Sephiroth

Narrator: _Testing is now complete, it's time to see who is more superior. The data from the tests will be uploaded into a simulation, developed by Slitherine Studios. To keep this battle from being won by a single lucky blow, the simulation will be ran 1000 times. Who will win? Spartan vs SOLDIER...Cruel vs Cunning...Demigod vs Mortal..._

(Then screen shows Kratos, then Sephiroth. Next, the screen shows Kratos brutily attacking a village, then Sephiroth planning his next move. Finally, the screen shows Kratos slaying the baskilisk, then Sephiroth and Cloud clashing swords.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST?_

* * *

Simulation:

Sephiroth is in the forest, practicing with his Masamune. He was about to attack a dummy of Cloud for his next battle with him, when he hears a dying bellow that sounds like a cross between a man and a bull. Curiously, he walks to the edge of the forest, outlooking a field.

In the field, Sephiroth sees Kratos, who has just slain a minotaur. Seeing him as a threat, Sephiroth pulls out his hand cannon, takes aim, and fires. The bullet bearly misses as it hits Kratos' blade. Kratos turns around and spots Sephiroth. As Sephiroth tries to reload, Kratos pulls out Appollo's Bow and fires.

The arrow made contact with Sephiroth's arm. Grunting in pain, he pulls out the arrow and retreats as he sees Kratos coming at him with his Blade of Olympus. As he runs into the forest, Kratos looks around for his foe. Unknown to him, Sephiroth was up on a tree limb, with his war hammer.

Sephiroth jumps down and swings his hammer at Kratos. The latter caught wind of this, however, as he swung his blade, slicing Sephiroth's hammer in half. Kratos swings again, this time aiming for Sephiroth, but the latter jumps out of the way.

Sephiroth picks up his Black Materia and shouts, "METEOR!" resulting in a meteor to head stright for Kratos. The Spartan, however, just blocks it with his golden fleece, sending the meteor back into the atmosphere. Sephiroth was about to summon another meteor, when he felt a sharp pain in his leg.

The SOLIDER looks down and sees one of the Nemean cestus clamped onto his leg. He then sees Kratos pulling it torwards him. Sephiroth fights back as he notices his trusted weapon nearby...The Masamune.

Sephiroth uses the Masamune to slice through the chains of the cestus. He gets up and charges at Kratos with the sword, only for the latter to block it with his own. The two clash their blades together, until Sephiroth sees an opening. He swings the Masamune at Kratos' right knee, causing the latter to grunt in pain.

Sephiroth then takes his Masamune and impales Kratos in the chest. The latter falls down, dead. Sephiroth turns his body over, making sure his opponent is dead. He then roars to the sky in victory.

* * *

Winner: Sephiroth

Narrator: This was the closest match so far. In the 1000 battles, Sephiroth was victorius with 506-kills while Kratos was only able to score 494-kills.

Kratos' kills: 494

Appollo's Bow- 268

Nemean Cestus- 190

Blade of Olympus- 36

Golden Fleece- 0

Sephiroth's kills: 506

Hand Cannon- 197

Masamune- 300

War Hammer- 2

Black Materia- 7

At the fight club, the teams discuss what happened.

"Sephiroth just got lucky." Deimos said, upset with the outcome.

"I hate to admit it, but I had no doubt that Sephiroth win beat him." Cloud stated.

(The screen then shows Sephiroth roaring in victory.)


	5. Deathstroke vs Deadpool

**I don't own the show "Deadliest Warrior" or any of the characters fighting in it.**

**

* * *

**

Narrator: _Deathstroke; The vilainous mercenary for hire of the DC Universe._

(The screen shows a man with one eye, wearing black and orange ninja attire, moving in to attack his target.)

Narrator: _Deadpool; The anti-heroic mercenary for hire of the Marvel Universe._

(The screen then shows a man wearing red and black ninja attire, gunning down his target.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST? To find out, our world-class fighters are testing both of the warrior's most leathel weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two go toe-to-toe. No rules, no safety, no mercey: It's a duel to the death, all to find out just who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!_

We once again enter the fight club.

Narrator: _Here at the fight club, the host has brought experts on both the warriors to see who would win in a battle between...Deathstroke..._

Deathstroke's Stats:

First appearance: The New Teen Titans #1 (1980)

Voice actor: Patrick Seitz

Alignment: Evil

Real name: Slade Wilson

Narrator: _And Deadpool..._

Deadpool's Stats:

First appearance: New Mutants #98 (1991)

Voice actor: Nolan North

Alignment: Veries

Real Name: Wade Wilson

Narrator: _Both teams are confident about their warrior's victories._

Team Deathstroke is represented by fellow DC villains, Joker and Riddler...Who have both hired Slade in the past.

"Deadpool is impressive," Joker commented, then added, "But he won't last five minutes with Slade!"

"Answer me this, viewers," Ridder said, "Why is he called Deathstroke? Because he causes death in one stroke!"

Team Deadpool will be represented by his friend, Weasel, and his side-kick, Bob, Hydra agent.

"Deathstroke is diffently gonna get the shock of his life from this fight, that I'm sure of." Weasel said.

"I seen what Deadpool can do," Bob said, "Deathstroke won't even know what hit him when the fights over."

Narrator: _The teams have brought the two mercenaries most deadly weapons..._

Deathstroke's weapons:

Long range- Remington 870 shotgun

Mid range- Mini Uzi

Close range- Broadsword

Special weapon- Bo staff

Explosive weapon- F1 Grenade

Deadpool's weapons:

Long range- AKM Assault Rifle

Mid range- Mac10

Close range- Twin Katana

Special weapon- Sai

Explosive weapon- RGD-5 Grenade

Narrator: _First up is long range. Team Deathstroke strikes first with...The Remington 870._

Out in the firing range, Joker takes a Remington 870 and aims at three targets made to look like Deadpool. He fires one round into each of the targets. The first goes right through the chest, just above the heart. The second went right through the stomach, and the third went in between the eyes.

Narrator: _Team Deadpool is not impressed as the fire back with...The AKM Assault Rifle._

Weasel steps out into the firing range with an AKM and aims at three targets made to look like Deathstroke. He aims at them and fires. One bullet went through the neck; a second through the lower jaw; and the final one went through the stomach.

Narrator: _It comes down to a battle between stopping power vs longer range. With the longer range advantage, the AKM gets the edge._

Edge: Deadpool

Narrator: _Next is mid range weapons. Team Deathstroke brings to the fight...The Mini Uzi._

Riddler steps out to the firing range and aims a mini uzi at a target. He pulls the trigger and a rapid shower of bullets go right through the head, neck and shoulders.

Narrator: _Impressed as they are, Team Deadpool fires back with...The Mac10._

Bob steps out into the firing range with a mac10 and aims at a target. The side-kick pulls the trigger and a shower of high speed bullets zoom right into the target.

Narrator: _Both were excellent mid range weapons, but with more shots and a faster rate of fire, the mini uzi gets the edge._

Edge: Deathstroke

Narrator: _For close range weapons, we leave the guns behind and test out the two warrior's swords...Deathstroke's Broadsword and Deadpool's Twin Katana._

Joker steps up to a carcass with the broadsword and swings. The sword slices through the carcass on the first swing, splitting it in two.

Next, Weasel steps up to a gel torso with the twin katana. He swings one, and slices through the neck. He swings the other and slices through the stomach.

Narrator: _The broadsword had more power then one katana; but TWO katanas can bring more options to the fight, giving the twin katanas the edge._

Edge: Deadpool

Narrator: _For special weapons, Team Deathstroke brings to the fight...The Bo Staff._

Riddler takes a bo staff into a room filled with ceramic pots. He swings violently, causing the pots to shatter into pieces.

Narrator: _Team Deadpool is not impressed as they counter with...The Sai._

Bob takes out two sais and steps up to a gel torso. He takes the sai and stabs them into the neck, the chest, and the head.

Narrator: _The sais were deadly, but they need to be at a close distance to be effective. With it's longer range, the bo staff gets the edge._

Edge: Deathstroke

Narrator: _Finally, it's time for explosive weapons. Team Deathstroke brings...The F1 Grenade._

Joker steps out into the firing range were three targets are standing. He takes out the F1, pulls out the pin, throws the grenade and runs for it. As the grenade landed at the feet of the targets, it went off and destroyed one of the targets, leaving the second with minimal injuries, and the third unharmed.

Narrator: _Team Deadpool is not impressed. They fire back with...The RGD-5 Grenade._

Weasel steps out into the firing range were three new targets were standing. He takes out an RGD-5 and does the same thing Joker did with the F1. The grenade lands at the target's feet and went off. After the explosion, only two of the three were destroyed, the thrid had minor injuries.

Narrator: _Due to it having the bigger explosion and having more damage, the edge goes to the RGD-5._

Edge: Deadpool

Narrator: _Testing is now complete, it's time to see who is more superior. The data from the tests will be uploaded into a battle simulation, developed by Slitherine Studios. To keep this battle from being won by a single lucky shot, the simulation will be ran 1000 times. Who will win? Villain vs Anti-Hero...Mercenary vs Mercenary...DC vs Marvel..._

(The screen shows Deathstroke targeting an innocent bystander, then Deadpool targeting a Mafia leader one day and a polition the next. Next, the screen shows Deathstroke, then Deadpool. Finally, the screen shows Deathstroke making a deal with Lex Luther, then Deadpool teaming up with the X-Men.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST?_

* * *

Simulation:

In an abandoned warehouse, Deadpool is training solo, getting prepared for any mission later on. Unbeknown to him, Deathstroke, who was hired to assasinate him by Black Tom Cassidy, is sneaking around outside.

Deathstroke pulls out his F1 grenade as he comes closer. He pulls the pin and throws the grenade through the open window. The grenade lands near Deadpool's feet, but he quickly gets out of the way before it goes off.

"What in the-" Deadpool started saying until he was cut off by Deathstroke breaking down the door and firing his Mini Uzi at him.

Deadpool dodges the bullets and jumps behind a crate. He mutters to himself, "You want a battle? I give you a war!" and pulls out his AKM and starts firing back. Deathstroke dodges the bullets, but one grazed his shoulder blade, causing him to drop the uzi.

Deathstroke fires back with his Remington 870 and manages to disarm Deadpool. Deadpool angry yells out, "Hey! Whoever is writing this thing! If you think this is a joke, it's not funny!"

Deadpool pulls out his Mac-10 and fires at Deathstroke. A few of the bullets managed to hit the latter's left leg and stomach. Wounded, but not down yet, Deathstroke dodges the other bullets while friring his remington 870, but falls from the leg injury. He looks up to see Deadpool standing over him, holding the Mac-10 at point blank range.

"Thought you could get the drop on me, eh?" Deadpool asked. "Well, I hope you're hungry, because I got plenty of...LEAD!" Deadpool pulls the trigger of his Mac-10.

CLICK!

Deadpool looks at his gun, seeing that he has ran out of bullets. He then shouts, "HEY, AUTHOR! WILL YOU CUT THAT O-UMPF!"

He was cut shot as he saw Deathstroke recover and sees that the latter had jabbed him in the stomach with his bo staff. Deathstroke twirls the staff 360 degrees and lunges forward again...

...Only for the staff to be blocked by Deadpool's twin katanas. The impact between the staff and one of the katanas, however, caused it to be lodged within the staff. Deadpool swings the other katana at Deathstroke's knee cap, causing the latter to roar in pain.

Deathstroke kicks Deadpool in the face, sending him into a wall and disarming him of both katanas. Deathstroke sees his chance and pulls out his broadsword. He swings the sword, but Deadpool quickly recovers and dodges it. Deathstroke swings again and slices a little bit of Deadpool's leg, which caused the latter to scream in pain.

Deathstroke pins Deadpool to the wall, about ready to slice his neck with the sword. Suddenly, he feels a sharp pain in his chest and stomach. He looks down and sees that Deadpool stabbed both areas with his sai.

Deadpool then kicks Deathstroke away and watches him fall to the floor. Deadpool smirks and begins to walk out of the warehouse. But he hears groaning, turns and sees Deathstroke crawling for the mini uzi he dropped.

"Hey," Deadpool yelled, getting Deathstroke's attention, "Think fast!"

Deadpool then throws his RGD-5 grenade at Deathstroke and bails. As soon as he reaches the door...

BOOOOOM!

Deadpool looks back at the dead body of Deathstroke. He smirks, turns to the author and asks, "Couldn't you give me more of a challange next time?" He then walks off to find a different training location, but not without swiping Deathstroke's weapons.

* * *

Winner: Deadpool

Narrator: _In the 1000 battles, Deadpool was victorious with 548-kills, compared to Deathstroke's 452-kills._

Deathstroke's kills: 452

Remington 870 Shotgun- 126

Mini Uzi- 215

Broadsword- 30

Bo staff- 27

F1 grenade- 54

Deadpool's kills: 548

AKM Assault Rifle- 313

Mac 10- 112

Twin Katanas- 60

Sai- 4

RGD-5 grenade- 59

At the fight club, the teams discuss what happened.

"This is why I don't really trust computers." Joker said.

"Honestly, I think Deathstroke can be anyone," Bob said, then added, "except Deadpool."

(The screen then shows Deadpool training with the broadsword.)


	6. ANBU Ninjas vs Firebenders

**I don't own the show "Deadliest Warrior" or any of the characters fighting in it.**

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**

Narrator: _ANBU Ninjas; The elite forces of Kahona, protecting it from any exceptional threat._

(The screen shows a man in black and gray armor and an animal mask killing a rogue nin.)

Narrator: _Firebenders; Ruthless warriors of the Fire Nation._

(The screen then shows a man in red and black armor shooting fire from his hands.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST? To find out, our world-class fighters are testing both of the warrior's most leathel weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two go toe-to-toe. No rules, no safety, no mercey: It's a duel to the death, all to discover just who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!_

We once again enter the fight club.

Narrator: _Here at the fight club, the host has brought experts on each of the opposing teams to see who would win between...Five ANBU Ninjas..._

ANBU's Stats:

Origin: Naruto

Mission: Protect Kahona

Loyalty: The Kage

Armor: Leather

Narrator: _And five Firebending Warriors..._

Firebender's Stats:

Origin: Avatar: The Last Airbender (Episode 1; "The Boy in the Iceberg")

Mission: World Conquest (former)

Loyalty: The Fire Lord

Armor: Leather

Narrator: _Both teams belive their warriors will triumpth over the other._

Team ANBU is represented by Yamato and Shin.

"I will admit, those firebenders are tough," Yamato said, "But are they organized enough to stand in our way? I highly doubt it."

"Fire is great and all, but we'l see if they have what it takes." Shin said in agreement.

Team Firebender is represented by Fire Lord Zuko and General Iroh.

"The ANBU might be well organized, but they just can't compete with a firebender." Zuko stated.

"I know that looks are deciving, but firebenders are just as agile as they are strong." Iroh added.

Narrator: _Both teams have brought the two groups most leathal weapons..._

ANBU's weapons:

Long range- Blow Gun

Mid range- Shuriken; Kusarigama

Close range- Katana

Special weapons- Kuni/Explosive Tag Combo

Firebender's weapons:

Long range- Yumi Bow

Mid range- Spear

Close range- Dao Sword

Special weapon- Firebending

Narrator: _First up is long range. Team ANBU strike first with...The Blow Gun; able to shoot a deadly dart._

Yamato steps in firing range of a dummy made to look like a firebender. He raises the reed to his mouth and shoots the first dart that hits the chest, but doesn't penatrate the armor. The second dart shot manages to hit the throat.

Narrator: _Team Firebender is not impressed as they fire back with...The Yumi Bow; able to pin a fly from 100 feet away._

Zuko steps out into the firing range and aims the arrow at a target made to look like an ANBU. He fires the first arrow and hits the chest, penetrating the armor. He fires another arrow that hits the target directly in between the nose and upper lip.

Narrator: _The blow gun was deadly with it's poison, but not accurate. Because of it's accuratecy and longer range, the edge goes to the yumi bow._

Edge: Firebender

Narrator: _Next is mid range weapons. Team ANBU brings two weapons to the fight...The Shuriken and The Kusarigama._

Shin takes out four shurikens and throws them at a target made to look like a firebender. He throws one at a time. The first one hit the target in the chest, but didn't pirece the armor. The second managed to hit the target on the nose, and the thrid and fourth missed the target completely.

Next, Shin takes a kusarigama and stands in front of another target made to look like a firebender. He swings the pick axe-like part at the target, penetrating the armor and going right through the chest. He then uses the ball and chain part to swing at the head, cracking the skull, even through the helmet.

Narrator: _Team Firebender is impressed, but not impressed enough. They fire back with...The Spear._

Iroh picks up a spear and stands near a target made to look like an ANBU. He thrusts forward and stabs through the armor and through the other side of the target.

Narrator: _The spear managed to outdo the shuriken, but with the kusarigama, you get two options to deliver a kill. The edge goes to the kusarigama._

Edge: ANBU

Narrator: _Now it's time for close range weapons. Team ANBU brings...The Katana._

Yamato steps up to a carcass dressed in firebender armor, katana in hands. He swings the sword and slices through the armor and flesh, delivering a devestating kill in a matter of seconds.

Narrator: _Team Firebender is impressed, but answer back with...The Dao Sword._

Zuko steps up to a carcass wearing ANBU armor, with the dao in hand. He swings the dao and slices through the flesh and armor like butter, delivering a kill that was also made in mear seconds.

Narrator: _Both swords are lightning quick and deliver killing blows. The edge goes to both the katana and the dao._

Edge: Draw

Narrator: _Finally, it's time for special weapons. Team ANBU brings...The Kuni/Explosive Tag Combo._

Shin steps out in the firing range with the kuni/explosive tag. He steps up to a target wearing firebender armor and jabs the kuni in it's neck. He then goes over to another target, with the same armor, and jabs the kuni into the armor, getting it lodged half-way in. He lights the tag and runs for it. The bomb goes off and blows up the target.

Narrator: _Team Firebender is impressed, but fire back with a technique that gave their warrior's their name...Firebending._

Iroh steps out into the firing range and a few feet away from a target made to look like an ANBU. He takes a deep breath, and unleashes a stream of fire from his hands. In mear minutes, the target is reduced to ashes.

Narrator: _Although it had a longer range, firebending is a one shot-one kill. The kuni/explosive tag is a one-two punch, both stabbing and exploding, giving it the edge._

Edge: ANBU

Narrator: _Testing is now complete, it's time to see who is more superior. The data from the tests will be uploaded into a battle simulation, developed by Slitherine Studios. To keep this battle from being won by a single lucky blow, the simulation will be ran 1000 times. Who will win? Stealth vs Brute Force...Fighting For Protection vs Fighting For Glory...Squad vs Squad..._

(The screen shows an ANBU aiming his blow gun at an unsuspecting target, then a firebender attacking head on. Next, the screen shows an ANBU killing a rogue nin, then a firebender being worshiped as a hero by others. Finally, the screen shows a squad of ANBU, then a army of firebenders.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST?_

* * *

Simulation:

In an abandoned and destroyed village, five ANBU ninjas are jumping from roof top to roof top. The leader then signals them to stop. They look down and notice five firebender soilders roaming the streets.

ANBU: 5

Firebenders: 5

One of the ANBU pulls out his shuriken and throws it at one of the firebenders. Unfortuately, the shuriken misses it's target and gets caught in a nearby pole. This alerts the firebenders as they look up and see the ANBU.

One of the firebenders pulls out his Yumi bow and shoots it at the leader. Another ANBU jumps in the way, however, giving his life to save his leader's.

ANBU: 4

Firebenders: 5

The ANBU leader orders for the team to split up, going in opposite directions. The firebender leader and another firebender go after one of them, while the others go chasing the other ANBU.

With one of the firebenders, he searches through the ruins of the village. Unknown to him, however, two ANBU are laying in wait. One of them fires his blow gun at the back of the firebender, but the dart bounces off his armor. The firebender looks up and sees the ANBU. He then shoots a stream of flame at them, which they evoid. One of the ANBU pulls out his katana and clashes blades with the firebender. The other sneaks up from behind and stabs the firebender in the back of the neck with his kuni.

ANBU: 4

Firebenders: 4

The firebender leader and his soilder chase an ANBU down an ally way, and corners him. The ANBU pulls out his kusarigama and lunges the spike part at the closest firebender, pericing the armor. The firebender leader, in turn, impales the ANBU with his spear.

ANBU: 3

Firebenders: 3

The ANBU leader runs into an abandonded building with two firebenders on his tail. The lose sight of him in the wreckage inside and split up.

One Firebender looks around and sees nothing. The ANBU leader then sneaks up behind him and jabs a kuni in his back, pericing the armor, but not killing him. The firebender turns around to attack, but the ANBU leader slices the former's leg with his katana, causing the firebender to kneel in pain. The other firebender hears this and chages at the ANBU leader with his spear. The ANBU then cuts off the spear head and runs for it. The firebender that's still standing shoots a stream of flames at the ANBU leader, but misses.

A burning smell is sensed as the firebender looks down to see a paper attached to the kuni that was on fire. Suddenly...

BOOOM!

The explosion from the explosive tag killed the firebender with the kuni in his armor and sends the other flying backwards, baddly injured.

ANBU: 3

Firebenders: 2

The injured firebender tries to get up, but sees the ANBU leader standing above him. The ANBU leader raises his katana and stabs the firebender while he's down.

ANBU: 3

Firebenders: 1

The firebender leader looks around for any sign of the enemy. An ANBU then jumps out and pulls out his kusarigama, hitting the firebender leader with the ball and chain part. The ANBU goes in to deliver a fatal blow with the pointed part, but the firebender leader pulls out his dao sword and impales him.

ANBU: 2

Firebenders: 1

Another ANBU, wittnessing this, pulls out a blow gun and shoots a dart at him, but it misses. The firebender leader turns around to see the ANBU quickly trying to reload. He then lets out a stream of fire from his hands and hears a scream.

ANBU: 1

Firebenders: 1

The ANBU leader looks down from a roof top at the firebender leader and jumps down, katana out and ready. The firebender leader then pulls out his dao and the two clash blades. After a few strikes the firebender leader slices the ANBU leader's leg, but the latter dodges the next swing. The ANBU leader then jumps behind the firebender leader and stabs him in the back with his katana.

ANBU: 1

Firebenders: 0

The ANBU leader lowers the dead firebender to the ground. He then bows in respect for his fallen comrads before limping off to heal his wounds.

* * *

Winner: ANBU Ninjas

Narrator: _In the 1000 battles, the ANBU was victorious with 588-kills, compared to the Firebender's 412-kills._

ANBU's kills: 588

Blow Gun- 0

Shuriken- 0

Kusarigama- 133

Katana- 342

Kuni/Explosive Tag Combo- 113

Firebender's kills: 412

Yumi Bow- 100

Spear- 49

Dao Sword- 164

Firebending- 99

At the fight club, the teams discuss what happened.

"You can be one of the toughest rogues on earth," Yamato said, "But the ANBU will always get you."

"The ANBU may have won the battle, but the Firebenders win the war." Zuko said.

(The screen then shows the ANBU leader being treated for his injuries.)


	7. Predators vs Locusts

**I don't own the show "Deadliest Warrior" or any of the characters fighting in it.**

**

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**

Narrator: _Predators; The intergalactic hunters who take on the most dangerous of game._

(The screen shows a alien creature firing a strange weapon at a team of Spetznas.)

Narrator: _Locusts; The ruthless reptilian humanoids who plan to populate Sera, and exterminate every human on sight._

(The screen then shows an ugly reptilian-like monster firing a gun at a team of COG soilders.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST? To find out, our world-class fighters are testing the two teams most leathal weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two go toe-to-toe. No rules, no safety, no mercey: It's a duel to the death, all to find out just who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!_

We once again enter the fight club.

Narrator: _Here at the fight club, the host has brought experts/members of the two beastly teams to discover who would win between...The Predators..._

Predator Stats:

First apperance: Predator (1987)

Size: 7 feet tall; 330 lbs

Enimes: Xenomorphs (aka Aliens)

Armor: Wire-mesh armor

Narrator: _And The Locust Horde._

Locust Stats:

First Apperance: Gears of War (2006)

Size: 7-8.1 feet tall; Unknown weight

Enimes: COG

Armor: Strip armor

Narrator: _Both teams are confident of their warrior's success._

Team Predator will be represented by Alexa Wood, who fought along side the Predators, and Wolf, a Predator Veteran who will be testing the weapons.

"The Locust are tough, I'll give them that." Alexa said, "But let's see what happens when they go against one of the greatest alien hunters." Wolf nodded in agreement.

Team Locust will be represented by General RAMM and High Priest Skorge.

"The Predator against us? No contest!" RAMM commented.

"If COG can't beat us, these things sure won't be able to." Skorge added.

Narrator: _Both teams have brought the two beastly warrior's most devestating weapons..._

Predator's weapons:

Long range- Plasma Caster

Mid range- Combi Stick

Close range- Wrist Blades

Special weapon- Blazer

Explosive weapon- Remote Bomb

Locust's weapons:

Long range- Hammerburst Rifle

Mid range- Torque Bow

Close range- Butcher Knife

Special weapon- Explosive Flail

Explosive weapon- Bolo Grenade

Narrator: _First up is long range. Team Predator strikes first with...The Plasma Caster._

Wolf heads out into the firing range and activates his plasma casters. He aims them at two targets made to look like Locust and fires. Both the shots deliver a devestating blow to the heads of both of the targets.

Narrator: _Team Locust is impressed, but not enough. They counter with...The Hammerburst Rifle._

RAMM steps out into the firing range with the rifle. He takes aim at two targets made to look like Predators. He shoots six rounds into the first one's chest and six more into the second one's head...exactly where he aimed at.

Narrator: _Both weapons did devestating damage at long range, and both where accurate. Because of this, the edge is a draw._

Edge: Draw

Narrator: _Next is mid range weapons. Team Predator brings to the fight...The Combi Stick._

Wolf steps a few feet away from a carcass, wearing Locust armor, with the combi stick. He aims it and throws. The sharp edge of the spear-like stick goes through the armor and into the flesh.

Narrator: _Team Locust are not at all impressed. They answer back with...The Torque Bow; a weapon that fires exsposive arrows._

Skorge steps out into the firing range with the Torque Bow and aims at a target made to look like a Predator and fires an arrow which goes right through the chest. After 0.5 seconds, the target blows up.

Narrator: _The combi stick was impressive, but the Torque Bow is a deadlier weapon with it's longer range and explosive arrows. The edge goes to the Torque Bow._

Edge: Locust

Narrator: _Now it's time for close range weapons. Team Predator brings...The Wrist Blades._

Wolf walks up to a carcass wearing Locust armor and activates his wrist blades. The blades slice through the carcass with ease, penatrating the armor.

Narrator: _Impressed as they are, Team Locust answer back with...The Butcher Knife._

RAMM steps up to a gel torso, knife in hand. With one slice, he delivered a massive wound across the throat, nearly beheading it.

Narrator: _Both weapons were brutal and deadly. However, with it's longer range and larger size, the edge goes to the wrist blades._

Edge: Predator

Narrator: _Now time for special weapons. Team Predator brings to the fight...The Blazer._

Wolf steps out into the firing range and activates his blazer. He aims at four targets made to look like Locust and fires. Four beams then come from it and touches the four targets. Suddenly, the targets burst into flame.

Narrator: _Team Locust is impressed, but counter with...The Explosive Flail._

Skorge steps out into the firing range with the explosive flail. He runs full speed at a target made to look like a Predator, but when he gets a quarter of the way there, he swings the flail. When it made impact, it cracked the skull and blew the target up.

Narrator: _The explosive flail is an impressive weapon, but it needs to be in a close range. Due to it's longer range and ability to set targets ablaze, the edge goes to the blazer._

Edge: Predator

Narrator: _Finally, it's time for explosive weapons. Team Predator brings...The Remote Bomb._

Wolf steps out into the firing range with the remote bomb. He throws it at three targets and presses a button on his wrist computer. The bomb then explodes, destroying all three targets.

Narrator: _Team Locust believe their bomb is better, as they fire back with...The Bolo Grenade._

RAMM goes out to the firing range with the bolo grenade. He lefts it up and swings it around until he gained enough momentum and threw it at three targets. The grenade then went off, destroying one target while leaving the second badly injured, and the third completely unharmed.

Narrator: _Both explosives were deadly, but the Bolo Grenade has a smaller blast radius then the remote bomb, giving the latter the edge._

Edge: Predator

Narrator: _Testing is now complete, it's time to see who is more superior. The data from the tests will be uploaded into a computer simulation, developed by Slitherine Studios. To keep this show down from being won by a single lucky shot, the simulation will be ran 1000 times. Who will win? Stealthy Hunters vs Brutal Warriors...High Technology vs Brute Strength...Alien vs Beast..._

(The screen shows a Predator aiming his plasma casters at a pair of unsuspecting Yakuza, then a Locust firing his Torque Bow at a COG soilder. Next, the screen shows a Predator detonating a remote bomb with his wrist computer, then a Locust tearing an enemy to shreads with his bare hands. Finally, the screen shows the Predator, then a Locust.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST?_

* * *

Simulation:

In an abandoned, war zone-like city, a ship lands in an abandoned parking lot. The doors to the ship open, and out walk seven Predators. The group looks around when the leader sees something through his bio mask.

That "something" was a group of seven Locusts, having just won a fight against a group of COG soilders. The leader Predator tells his followers about this in his native tounge.

Predators: 7

Locusts: 7

The lead Locust is leading his followers through the city when he gets the sudden feeling that they're being watched...which they were. One of the Predators activates his plasma caster and fires it at a Locust, hitting it dead in the chest.

Predators: 7

Locusts: 6

Now on the alert, the remaining Locusts look up and see the Predators. The same Predator is about to fire again, but a Locust fires his Hammerburst rifle, killing the Predator.

Predators: 6

Locusts: 6

The lead Predator then orders his followers to split up into three groups, which they all do. The Locusts follow them, also split up into three groups.

Two Locusts follow two Predators into one of the abandoned buldings. They split up and search seperate floors. One of the Locusts spots a Predator on a chandelier and fires his hammerbrust rifle at him, bringing him down.

Predators: 5

Locusts: 6

The Locust then feels a sharp pain in his back. The reason: the second Predator stabbed him with his wrist blades. The Locust then falls to the floor, dead.

Predators: 5

Locusts: 5

On the second floor, the other Locust sees this from a hole in the floor. He takes out his Torque Bow and fires at the Predator. The arrow struck the Predator in the shoulder, but before he could pull it out...

BOOOOMMMM!

The blast from the explosive arrow killed him. Smirking, the Locust exited the building to find his leader.

Predators: 4

Locusts: 5

The lead Predator and another Predator were soon chased into an ally way by two Locusts. The second Predator stops and jumps onto a fire escape, pulling out his combi stick. When the two Locusts enter the ally, the Predator throws it at the second Locust, killing him.

Predators: 4

Locusts: 4

The first Locust hears this as he pulls out his Bolo Grenade and swings it around, aiming at the slightly confused Predator. The Locust throws the grenade at the Predator, who gets hit from the explosion.

Predators: 3

Locusts: 4

The lead Locust and two others (the other had just caught up to him) are seaching around for any sight of their enemies. Two Predators spot them as one charges at the second Locust with his wrist blades. The targeted Locust spots this in time and hits him with his Explosive Flail.

Predators: 2

Locusts: 4

The other Predator then runs out of the ally way as the lead Locust follows him. The two other Locusts follow their leader when they hear a clunk nearby.

Outside the ally way, the Predator pressed a button on his wrist computer, just as the lead Locust was exiting the ally. Suddenly, an explosion and two dying roars were heard.

Preadators: 2

Locusts: 2

Another Locust nearby spots the lead Predator and pulls out his butcher knife. He charges and knocks the lead Predator to the ground. Just as the Locust was about to stab him, the lead Predator puches him in the gut and activates his wrist blades.

Predators: 2

Locusts: 1

Meanwhile, the lead Locust chases after the second Predator. He fires his Torque Bow just as the Predator was about to fire his plasma caster. The arrow strikes the caster, resulting in the Predator blowing up.

Predators: 1

Locusts: 1

The lead Locust then hears a growl and looks up, seeing the lead Predator on a fire escape. The lead Locust fires his hammerburst rifle, but the lead Predator dodges and jumps down activating what the lead Locust believes is the lead Predator's plasma caster. Just as the former was about to fire his rifle again, a beam came out of the lead Predator's shoulder cannon. The moment the beam touched the lead Locust, he bursted into flames.

Predators: 1

Locusts: 0

The lead Predator looks at the charred remains of the lead Locust and lets out a loud roar in victory.

* * *

Winner: Predators

Narrator: _In the 1000 battles, the Predators were victorious with 600-kills. The Locusts weren't far behind with 400-kills._

Predator's kills: 600

Plasma Caster- 250

Combi Stick- 55

Wrist Blades- 24

Blazer- 201

Remote Bomb- 70

Locust's kills: 400

Hammerburst Rifle- 220

Torque Bow- 100

Butcher Knife- 1

Explosive Flail- 14

Bolo Grenade- 65

At the fight club, the teams discuss what happened.

"There was no doubt that the Predators would win this." Alexa said.

"That was just a simulation," RAMM said, "We'd desrtoy those things in real life."

(The screen then shows the lead Predator letting out a roar in victory.)


	8. M16 vs The Turks

**I don't own the show "Deadliest Warrior" or any of the characters fighting in it.**

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**

Narrator: _The M16; The United Kingdoms top espionage team, who travel the globe to take out it's most deadliest threats._

(The screen shows a Brittish man in a tuxedo aiming a gun at a leader of a Cartel boss.)

Narrator: _The Turks; Shinra's ellite espionage team, and Final Fantasy's answer to the KGB._

(The screen then shows a woman in a navy blue business suit shooting at a lone AVALANCHE scout.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST? To find out, our world-class fighters are testing the two teams most deadly weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two go toe-to-toe. No rules, no safety, no mercy: It's a duel to the death, all to find out just who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!_

We enter the fight club once again.

Narrator: _Here at the fight club, the host has brought experts/members of the two ellite espionage teams to discover who would win against...The M16..._

(James Bond) M16 Stats:

First (movie) apperance: Dr. No (1962)

Loyalty: England

Services: Espionage; Eliminating threats

Real world counterpart: The actual M16

Narrator: _And The Turks._

The Turks Stats:

First apperance: Final Fantasy VII (1997)

Loyalty: Shinra Electric Power Company

Services: Espionage; Kidnappings; Assassinations

Real world counterpart: KGB (with a little bit of Yakuza)

Narrator: _Both teams believe that their teams will out do the other._

Team M16 will be represented by James Bond, aka Agent 007, and by Q.

"The M16 is highly trained at espionage. I highly doubt that the Turks have a chance." Bond said.

"Don't get cocky, 007." Q told him, then added, "But I must agree with you on that."

Team Turks will be represented by Rufus Shinra and Elena.

"I may not be one of them, but The Turks are the ellite of the ellite." Rufus said.

"We're trained just as well- if not more- as the M16. We'll consider this their last mission." Elena added with a smirk.

Narrator: Both teams brought an arsenal of each teams devestating weapons...

M16's weapons:

Long range- Walther WA 2000 Sniper Rifle

Mid range- Ski Pole Gun

Close range- Walter P99 Pistol

Special weapon- Cyanide-laced Cigarette

The Turks' weapons:

Long range- Shinra Sniper Rifle

Mid range- Three-barrel Revolver

Close range- Electric Rod

Special weapon- Crimson Shuriken

Narrator: _First up is long range weapons. Both teams step up to the plates with their sniper rifles...The Walther WA 2000 Sniper Rifle and The Shinra Sniper Rifle._

James steps out into the firing range and aims his sniper rifle at a target made to look like a Turk agent. He pulls the trigger and sends a bullet flying into the side of the head.

Rufus then steps out into the firing range and aims the Shinra sniper rifle at a target made to look like a M16 agent. He fires and sends a bullet right into the targets forhead.

Narrator: _Both sniper rifles did their job at taking out the targets. With their same range and accuracy, both sniper rifles get the edge._

Edge: Draw

Narrator: _Next is mid range weapons. Team M16 bring to the fight...The Ski Pole Gun._

Q steps out into the firing range and aims a ski pole at a target made to look like a Turk agent. He pulls the trigger and sends a sharp pointed pole at the target, going right through it's side.

Narrator: _Team Turks is anything but impressed. They fire back with...The Three-barrel Revolver._

Elena steps out into the firing range and aims the three-barrel revolver at a target made to look like a M16 agent. She fires and three bullets go right into the target's chest.

Narrator: _The ski pole gun was deadly, but it wasn't all accurate and has only one shot. For it's accuracy and more shots, the three-barrel revolver gets the edge in mid range weapons._

Edge: The Turks

Narrator: _Now it's time for close range weapons. Team M16 bring to the fight...The Walter P99 Pistol._

James steps out into the firing range and aims his Walter P99 at a target made to look like a Turk agent. He fires and sends a bullet right in between the target's eyes. He fires again and shoots right at the chest.

Narrator: _Team Turks are impressed, but fire back with...The Electric Rod._

Rufus walks up to a carcass with the rod in hand. He jabs the rod right into the carcass as it sizzles from the electric volts. In a few minutes, the carcass has a huge burn mark.

Narrator: _Although both are terriffing ways to go, the Walther P99 gets the edge with it's longer range._

Edge: M16

Narrator: _Finally, it's time for special weapons. Team M16 brings...The Cyanide-laced Cigarette; another reason smoking is deadly._

Q steps over to a cage containing a grimlin (the evil ones from Grimlins) and hands it a cigarette. The grimlin takes it and puts it in his mouth. After a few seconds, he falls over dead.

Narrator: _Impressed as they are, Team Turks counter with...The Crimson Shuriken._

Elena takes a shuriken out and aims it at a target made to look like a M16 agent. She throws a shuriken at the target, and it makes contact with the face.

Narrator: _Both were deadly, but the cyanide-laced cigarette has a 50% chance of reaching it's target. Because of this flaw, the edge goes to the crimson shuriken._

Edge: The Turks

Narrator: _Testing is now complete, it's time to see who is more superior. The data from the tests will be uploaded into a computer simulation, developed by Slitherine Studios. To keep this show down from being won by a single lucky shot, the simulation will be ran 1000 times. Who will win? Spy vs Spy...Good vs Evil..._

(The screen shows a M16 agent, then a Turk. Next, the screen shows a M16 agent shooting a leader of a terrorist gang, then a Turk assassinating an AVALANCHE operative.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST?_

* * *

Simulation:

In a small isolated ski resort, a man (M16 agent 001) enters a hotel where he greets the bellhop (M16 agent 002) on his way to speek to the manager. Unknown to them, a man and woman (Turk agents 001 and 002) reading in the lobby are keeping an eye on M16 001.

When the M16 agent enters the office of the manager (Turk agent 003), he sits down and hands him a suitcase of money.

M16: 5

Turks: 5

The Turk agent smirks and nods, saying, "Okay, I guess it's time to hold up my end of the bargin." He hands M16 agent 001 an envelope containing a photograph of some type. M16 001 looks at the photo and nods.

"Here, compliments of my employer." M16 001 says as he hands Turk 003 a cigarette, which the latter accepts. Turk 003 places it in his mouth and looks for a lighter. Just as he's about to pick one up, he notices something funny about the cigarette and soon falls to the floor, dead.

M16: 5

Turks: 4

M16 001 smirks as he takes the photo and the money and leaves the office. When he reaches the lobby, he notices a janitor (Turk 004) talking to Turks 001 and 002. Nearby, a female skier (M16 agent 003) is talking to M16 002.

Turk 004 sees M16 001 and pulls out his crimson shuriken. He throws it and it hits the M16 agent in the throat.

M16: 4

Turks: 4

Seeing this, M16 002 pulls out his Walter P99 and shoots Turk 004, only to get shot by Turk 002's three-barrel revolver.

M16: 3

Turks: 3

M16 003 aims her ski pole at Turk 001 and fires a sharp pole into his chest.

M16: 3

Turks: 2

M16 003 then makes a run for it deeper into the hotel, with Turk 002 in hot pursuit.

Meanwhile, outside, a man on a ski slope (M16 agent 004) and a male skier (M16 agent 005) notice this through their binoculars. M16 005 then enters the hotel with his ski pole gun and Walter P99. When he gets inside, he notices the photo on the floor and picks it up.

Meanwhile, M16 003 was still being chased by Turk 002, dodging her bullets. Ducking into a janitors closet, she pulls out her Walter P99 and fires at Turk 002 as the latter opened the door.

M16: 3

Turks: 1

Her victory was short lived, however, as a bullet came flying at her and hit her in the back of the head.

M16: 2

Turks: 1

The source of the bullet came from a man from just outside the window (Turk agent 005) holding a Shinra sniper rifle. As he came in from said window, M16 005 appeared and fired his ski pole gun, which missed.

Turk 005 ran through the maze of hallways, dodging the bullets from M16 005's pistol. He jumped into a nearby room and pulled out his electric rod. As M16 005 was just about to pass the room he was in, Turk 005 jumped him and jabbed it into his neck.

M16: 1

Turks: 1

Smirking at a job well done, Turk 005 grabs the envelope, turns and leaves the hotel. He gets outside and is about to open his door when...

BANG!

He fell to the ground, dead. The source of this was from M16 004 who shot him with his WA 2000 sniper rifle.

M16: 1

Turks: 0

M16 004 walks over to the dead agent and picks up the envelope. He walks off to his own car as he checks the photo inside.

* * *

Winner: M16

Narrator: In the 1000 battles, M16 was victorious with 555-kills, compared to The Turks 445-kills.

M16's kills: 555

Walther WA 2000 Sniper Rifle- 331

Ski Pole Gun- 7

Walter P99 Pistol- 212

Cyanide-laced Cigarette- 5

The Turks' kills: 445

Shinra Sniper Rifle- 210

Three-barrel Revolver- 138

Electric Rod- 18

Crimson Shuriken- 79

At the fight club, the teams discuss what happened.

"They just got lucky is all." Rufus said, upset with the outcome.

"I think that The Turks are quite good at what they do," Q said, then added, "But not as good as what we do."

(The screen then shows M16 004 enter HQ with the photo.)


	9. Link vs Caspian

**I don't own the show "Deadliest Warrior" or any of the characters fighting in it.**

* * *

Narrator: _Link; The Hylain warrior and protector of Hyrule._

(The screen shows a teenager with long ears and brown/blonde hair, dressed in green and brown, firing arrows at an enemy of the kingdom.)

Narrator: _Prince Caspian; The warrior prince of Narnia._

(The screen then shows a teenager with long black hair, wearing knight-like armor, fighting off enemy soilders.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST? To find out, our world-class fighters are testing the two warrior's most devestating weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two go toe-to-toe. No rules, no safety, no mercy: It's a duel to the death, all to see just who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!_

We once again enter the fight club.

Narrator: _Here at the fight club, the host has brought experts on- and close allies to- the two warriors, to see who would win between...Link..._

Link's Stats:

First apperance: The Legend of Zelda (1986)

Race: Hylian

Homeland: Hyrule

Created by: Shigeru Miyamoto

Narrator: _And Prince Caspian._

Prince Caspian's Stats:

First apperance: The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian (Book: 1951; Movie: 2008)

Race: Telmarine

Homeland: Narnia

Created by: C.S. Lewis

Narrator: _Both teams are confident of their warrior's success._

Team Link is represented by Zelda/Shirke and by King Harkinean.

"My father and I have known Link for years," Zelda/Shirke said, "Not even Gannon's toughest warriors stand a chance."

"Link will be able to pull through, just as always." Harkinean added.

Team Caspian will be represented by King Peter "The Great" Pevensie and by King Ryan Huffman.

"I've seen what Caspian can do up-close, that Link person won't stand much of a chance." the former Narnian King said.

"I respect Link," Ryan said, then added, "But he's going up against someone who's almost unstopable."

Narrator: _The teams have brought their warrior's most deadly weapons..._

Link's weapons:

Long range- Hero's Bow

Mid range- Boomarang

Close range- Master Sword

Special weapon- Bombs

Prince Caspian's weapons:

Long range- Crossbow

Mid range- Pike

Close range- Broadsword

Special weapon- Mace

Narrator: _First up is long range weapons. Team Link steps up first with...The Hero's Bow._

Zelda, having transformed into Shirke, steps out to the firing range with the Hero's Bow. She aims it at a target made to look like Caspian and fires. The arrow flies through the air and goes right through the neck.

Narrator: _Team Caspian is impressed, but fire back with...The Crossbow._

Peter steps out into the firing range with the crossbow and aims it at a target made to look like Link. He pulls the trigger, and sends an arrow flying at the target, dead center in the chest.

Narrator: _Both weapons were deadly at long range. The crossbow was powerful and required less skill, but it has a shorter range, slower reloading time, and less accuracy. The Hero's Bow is and has the exact opposite, giving it the edge._

Edge: Link

Narrator: _Next is mid range weapons. Team Link bring to the fight...The Boomarang._

King Harkinean steps out to the firing range with the boomarang in hand and aims at a target made to look like Caspian. He throws the boomarang at the target, but it falls at the target's feet. He throws the boomarang again, and it cuts through the skin of the target, leaving a nasty fleash wound.

Narrator: _Team Caspian is not impressed. They retalleate with...The Pike._

Ryan steps a few feet from a carcass with a pike in hands. He then jabs the pike into the carcass, having it go through one side and out the other.

Narrator: _The boomarang had little to no killing power, unlike the pike, which is why the latter gets the edge._

Edge: Prince Caspian

Narrator: _Now it's time for close range weapons. Both teams brought their warrior's best swords...Link's Master Sword and Caspian's Broadsword._

Shirke steps up to a carcass with the Master sword in hand. She swings the sword and, in only one strike, sliced the carcass in half.

Peter then steps up to another carcass with the broadsword. Just like the Master sword, it sliced the carcass clean in half.

Narrator: _Both swords did what they were supposed to do, giving them both the edge in this match-up._

Edge: Draw

Narrator: _Finally, it's time for special weapons. Team Link bring to the fight...Bombs._

The King steps out into the firing range and places a bomb near a dummy made to look like Caspian. He lights it and runs. As soon as the fuse burnt out, the bomb exploded, knocking the dummy of it's feet...and taking one of the legs and an arm in the process.

Narrator: _Team Caspian is impressed, but fight back with...The Mace._

Ryan steps up to a gel torso with the mace in his hand. He swings full force and breaks the skull of the gel torso's head, as well as the top of the spine.

Narrator: _As deadly as the mace was, the edge goes to the bomb for it's high explosive power._

Edge: Link

Narrator: _Testing is now complete, it's time to see who is more superior. The data from the tests will be uploaded into a computer simulation, developed by Slitherine Studios. To keep this showdown from being won by a lucky blow, the simulation will be ran 1000 times. Who will win? Heylin Vs Telmarine...Knight Vs Warrior Prince..._

(The screen shows Link, then Prince Caspian. Next the screen shows Link being knighted by The King, then Caspian being crowned the king of The South Sea.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST?_

* * *

Simulation:

On a hill top in Narnia, Prince Caspian rides up on horseback and overlooks some of the ancient ruins. As he looks around, he sees something that catches his eye. That something was Link searching for any sign of Gannon. The Heylin looks up and sees Caspian.

Both warriors gale at each other, thinking that the other is a member of their enemy's armies. Caspian demounts his horse as he pulls out his crossbow. Just as he's about to pull the trigger, he sees Link throw his boomarang at him.

The Warrior prince jumps out of the way in time and fires his crossbow. The bolt from the crossbow hits Link in the arm as the Heylin pulls out the bolt and pulls out his Hero's Bow. He fires it at Caspian and the arrow hits the latter in the leg.

As Caspian pulls the arrow out, he sees Link charge up the hill with his Master sword. Caspian then pulls out his broadsword, charges at Link, and the two clash blades. Link swings up high to slash Caspian's neck, but the latter ducks in time and slashes the former's knee with the tip of the sword.

Link swings downward, but Caspian ducks out of the way again and runs into a ruin, Link in pursuit. Link notices the ruin Caspian has gone into and pulls out a bomb. He lights it and throws it in the ruin.

Inside, Caspian sees the bomb and jumps out of the way just as it went off, sending him flying, but not killing him. Link jumps inside with his Master sword and charges at Caspian. The latter however pulled out his mace, having lost his broadsword from the explosion, and hits Link in the side, causing him to groan in pain.

Caspian limps out of the ruin and back up the hill as Link chases after him with the Master sword in hand. As he reaches the top, Caspian pulls his pike out from the ground as Link came from behind him. Just as Link was about to deliver a killing blow, Caspian thrusts his Pike forward and impales him.

As he pulls the pike out, Caspian watches Link roll down the hill and land with a soft thud. Caspian then shouts out, "FOR NARNIA!"

* * *

Winner: Prince Caspian

Narrator: _In the 1000 battles, Prince Caspian was victorious with 526-kills, compared to Link's 475-kills._

Link's kills: 475

Hero's Bow- 308

Boomarang- 0

Master Sword- 50

Bombs- 117

Prince Caspian's kills: 526

Crossbow- 196

Pike- 216

Broadsword- 50

Mace- 64

At the fight club, the teams discuss what happened.

"That was only a simulation," Harkinian said, "I'd like to see that Caspian guy go up against Gannon!"

"Like I said before I respect Link," Ryan said, "But the title of 'Deadliest Warrior' will always go to Caspian or any other Narnian King."

(The screen then shows Caspian shouting, "FOR NARNIA!")


	10. Toon Patrol vs Suppression Squad

**I don't own the show "Deadliest Warrior" or any of the characters fighting in it.**

* * *

**AN: Yes, I'm aware that The Suppression Squad dosen't use any of these weapons.**

* * *

Narrator: _The Toon Patrol; Judge Doom's vicsious toon-hunting gang._

(The screen shows a group of weasels gunning down a group of cartoon caracters.)

Narrator: _The Suppression Squad; The power-hungry gang with the goal of world domination._

(The screen then shows a green hedgehog, yellow coyote, purple walrus, and two foxes planning out an invasion.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST? To find out, our world-class fighters are testing the two warrior's most devestating weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when the two go toe-to-toe. No rules, no safety, no mercy: It's a duel to the death, all to see just who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!_

We once again enter the fight club.

Narrator: _Here at the fight club, the host has brought together experts on/enemies of the two gangs to see who would win between...The Toon Patrol..._

Toon Patrol's Stats:

First appearance: Who Framed Roger Rabbit? (1998)

Goal: Catch and 'dip' Roger Rabbit.

Team Players: Wise Guy, Physco, Stupid, Greasy, and Wheezy

Loyaty: Judge Doom

Narrator: _And The Suppression Squad._

Suppression Squad's Stats:

First appearance: Sonic The Comic #24 (1995)

Goal: Domination of the Prime World.

Team Players: Scourge The Hedgehog, Fiona Fox, Patch D. Coolette, Boomer Walrus, and Miles Prower

Loyalty: Scourge (formaly); Miles (Curently)

Narrator: _Both teams belive their enemies will crush the other._

Team Toon Patrol will be represented by Eddie Valient and Jessica Rabbit.

"Those weasels maybe idiots- Heck, they are!-, but they've been fightin' alot longer then those other animals have." Valient said, holding up one of the Patrol's weapons.

"When this is over, the weasels will be having a few new trophies on their hands." Jessica quipped.

Team Suppression Squad will be represented by Sonic The Hedgehog and former Squad member, Bunns Rabbot/Anti-Bunnie.

"The reason the weasels are going to lose is because they're bringing old weapons to this battle." Sonic said.

"As a former member myself, I knew what the Squad's capable of." Bunns said, then added, "The minute this fight starts, the Squad will be on them like ugly on an ape!"

Narrator: Both teams have brought the two gangs most deadly weapons.

Toon Patrol's weapons:

Long range- Tommy Gun

Mid range- Sawed-off Shotgun

Close range- Ice Pick

Special weapon- Toon Bomb

Explosive weapon: Pineapple Bomb

Suppression Squad's weapons:

Long range- AK-47 Assault Rifle

Mid range- LPO-50 Flamethrower

Close range- Stilleto Knife

Special weapon: Twin Hooks

Explosive weapons: F1 Grenade

Narrator: _First up is long range weapons. Both teams bring old friends of Deadliest Warrior...The Toon Patrol's Tommy Gun and Suppression Squad's AK-47._

Eddie heads out into the firing range with the tommy gun and aims at five targets made to look like The Suppression Squad. He fires the gun and showers the targets with bullets, some mostly going through the chest area of four of the targets and causing a mortal wound in the fifth.

Next, Sonic steps out with an AK-47 and fires at five targets made to look like The Toon Patrol. He fires one at a time at each one, getting the face, chest, and stomach of all five targets.

Narrator: _The tommy gun was faster then the AK-47, but not as accurate. And while the tommy has greater fire power, the AK has longer range. Due to it's accuracy and longer range, the AK-47 gets the edge._

Edge: Suppression Squad

Narrator: _Next up is mid range. Team Toon Patrol bring...The Sawed-off Shotgun._

Jessica steps out into the firing range with the sawed-off shotgun and takes aim at five targets made to look like The Suppression Squad. She fires five shots at the targets in different locations: the neck in the first target, the chest in the second, the stomach in the third and fourth, and in between the eyes of the fifth.

Narrator: _Team Suppression Squad is unimpressed as they answer back with...The LPO-50 Flamethrower._

Bunns steps out into the firing range with the LPO-50 strapped to her back and aims at five targets made to look like The Toon Patrol. She fires and a jet of flame comes out and engulfs the targets in flames, turning them into nothing but ashes.

Narrator: _While the sawed-off shotgun had longer range, the flamethrower gets the edge for the physcological factor it brings._

Edge: Suppression Squad

Narrator: _Next up is close range. Team Toon Patrol brings...The Ice Pick._

Eddie steps up to a gel torso with the ice pick and stabs it in the chest, neck, and stomach. He then jabs the torso in the face with the pick right between the eyes.

Narrator: _Team Suppression Squad is unmoved as they come with...The Stilleto Knife._

Sonic steps up to another gel torso with the stilleto and acctivates the blade. He slashes the face and neck of the torso, then stabs it in the torso's chest.

Narrator: _Both weapons were equally as deadly, but the stilleto had brought a suprise factor. Also, whereas the ice pick can only stab, the stilleto can stab AND slash, giving it the edge._

Edge: Suppression Squad

Narrator: _Now we move on to special weapons. Team Toon Patrol bring...The Toon Bomb._

Jessica places a bomb near five targets made to look like The Suppression Squad and lights the fuse. After getting out of the way just in time, the bomb explodes in a ball of fire, leaving little left.

Narrator: _Team Suppression Squad is impressed, but counter with...The Twin Hooks._

Bunns walks up to a carcass with the twin hooks and slashes with them both. She then stabs it with the pointed ends. Finally, she connects the two hooks together and swings them, slicing the carcass in half.

Narrator: _Despite the twin hooks giving more options, the trauma by them is nothing compared to the toon bomb's trauma._

Edge: Toon Patrol

Narrator: _Finally, it's time for explosive weapons. Team Toon Patrol bring...The Pineapple Bomb. _

Eddie heads out to the firing range with the pineapple bomb. He pulls the pin, throws it at a group of targets and runs. The grenade went off and placed shrapenal into three of the targets and knocked the other two over.

Narrator: _Team Suppression Squad are impressed, but not enough. They fire back with...The F1 Grenade._

Sonic steps out into the firing range with the F1. He does the exact thing Eddie does and runs off. When the grenade went off, fragmentation went into four of the targets and knocked the other one over.

Narrator: _Both grenades did their jobs, but due to it's bigger blast, the F1 gets the edge._

Edge: Suppression Squad

Narrator: _Testing is now complete, it's time to see who is more superior. The data from the tests will be uploaded into a computer simulation, developed by Slitherine Studios. To keep this showdown from being won by a lucky shot, the simulation will be ran 1000 times. Who will win? Gang vs Gang...Old vs New..._

(The screen shows The Suppression Squad, then The Toon Patrol. Next, the screen shows Wise Guy firing his shotgun, then Scourge firing his AK-47.)

Narrator: _WHO...IS...DEADLIEST?_

* * *

Simulation:

A Dodge Humpback pulls up to a hotel, and five weasels (armed with various weapons) exit the car and enter the doors into the lobby. This was The Toon Patrol. The desk clerk gulped as he tried to leave, but Wise Guy aimed his Tommy Gun at him.

The clerk and the weasels then hear a 'Ding' and look at the doors of a nearby elevator opening, revealing a green hedgehog (Scourge), a brown coyote (Patch D. Coolette), a purple walrus (Boomer), a red fox (Fiona), and a yellow fox (Miles) as they exited the elevator (also armed with various weapons). They were The Suppression Squad.

TP: 5

SS: 5

Both gangs glare at each other, waiting for the other side to make their move. Greasy then notices Miles take out an F1 grenade and shouts, "BOSS! A BOMB!"

At this, The Toon Patrol fire their weapons, managing to shoot Miles before he pulls the pin.

TP: 5

SS: 4

The rest of the Suppression Squad return fire as Patch manages to shoot Stupid.

TP: 4

SS: 4

Wise Guy fires his tommy gun at Scourge, but the latter uses the clerk as a human shield as he orders the Patch, Boomer and Fiona to split up, Fiona with him. He drops the 'shield' and runs with Fiona deeper into the hotel, Boomer runs out into the parking lot, and Patch down a long hallway. Wise guy, after picking up Stupid's shotgun, orders Greasy and Physco to follow Boomer, and Wheezy to follow Patch while he follows Scourge and Fiona.

Out in the parking, Greasy and Physco are searching for Boomer. The walrus in question was behind a truck with a LPO-50 flamethrower strapped to his back. He then jumps out from behind the truck and roasts Physco.

TP: 3

SS: 4

He aims for Greasy next, but the weasel dodges the flames and hides behind a car. He then pulls out his pineapple bomb, pulls the pin, and throws it at Boomer. The explosion of the bomb caused an even bigger explosion as the tank of the flamethrower blew up.

TP: 3

SS: 3

Greasy then walks back into the hotel.

Meanwhile, Patch and Wheezy are in a fire fight of their own as Patch fires his AK-47 and Wheezy fires his Sawed-off Shotgun, so far neither had got a single hit. Wheezy continues firing until he runs out of bullets. As he tries to reload, Patch takes this oppertunity and shoots Wheezy with his AK.

TP: 2

SS: 3

However, at that moment, Greasy had entered and fired his tommy gun at Patch, showering him with bullets.

TP: 2

SS: 2

Scourge and Fiona were searching for Wise Guy when they heard gun shots. They ran to find out what the source was and saw Greasy aiming his tommy gun at them. He had just pulled the trigger when...

Click!

It turned out he was out of ammo. As he tried to turn to run and reload, he felt a sharp pain in his back as Fiona stabbed him with the pointed part of her twin hooks. As Greasy falls, Scourge shoots him with his AK, just to be sure he stays down.

TP: 1

SS: 2

Suddenly a hissing noise is heard as Fiona looks down and sees a toon bomb near Scourge. She runs up to him and pushes him out of the way, just as the bomb went off.

TP: 1

SS: 1

Scourge looked behind him and saw Wise Guy aiming his shotgun. Scourge quickly jumped out of the way and just as the weasel pulled the trigger. Both the hedgehog and the weasel aimed their firearms at each other and fired at the same time.

Click!

Click!

Turns out that both had ran out of ammo. Rather then reloading, they tossed their guns aside. Wise Guy pulled out his ice pick as Scourge pulled out his stilleto and acctivated the blade. Both gang leaders make mock stabs at each other, hoping to lure the other into a closer distance. Luckily, for Scourge, Wise Guy reached forward and jabbed him in the wrist, but that proved to be a deadly mistake for the weasel. Scourge grabbed him by the neck and sabbed him in the stomach with his stilleto, saying, "This is for Fiona." He then pulls the knife out and slashes Wise Guy's neck.

TP: 0

SS: 1

Scourge then drops Wise Guy and then he leaves the hotel.

* * *

Winner: Suppression Squad

Narator: _Throughout the 1,000 battles, The Suppression Squad won with 592-kills, compared to The Toon Patrol's 408-kills._

Toon Patrol's kills: 408

Tommy Gun...238

Sawed-Off Shotgun...45

Ice Pick...1

Toon Bomb...99

Pineapple Bomb...25

Suppression Squad's kills: 592

AK-47 Assault Rifle...265

LPO-50 Flamethrower...224

Stilleto Knife...2

Twin Hooks...66

F1 Grenade...35

At the fight club, the teams discuss what happened.

"That was just a simulation." Valient said, "Have they fought in real life, it would have gone a whole different direction."

"The Toon Patrol is good..." Bunns said, "But not good enough to beat the Supression Squad."

(The screen then shows Scourge leaving the hotel.)


End file.
